Dan Germain

merry christmas

I hope Santa brings you some Superstars.

all I want for christmas...

...is a car that doesn't explode. Just broke down making my final trip home for the year. Called the nice man from the AA, who unfolded the magic trailer from the back of his van (very Transformers) and off we go up the M40 to Oxford.

I think I'll be needing a new car (when I said explode, I meant it sounded exactly like someone had unleashed a bag of spanners under the bonnet), so if you have any recommendations I'm all ears.

For the record, the man from the AA said that Mercs and BMWs aren't as reliable as they used to be. Saab and VW are steady as she goes, as are Vauxhall and Ford. Stay away from the Renault Laguna and most Peugeots. And never knock a Skoda. That's what he said.

i just had a yorkie

Haven't had one for ages. It tasted really good. I used to eat lots of them, and have to admit to shoplifting a fair few of them in my youth, which is something I've never really owned up to before. So I'd like to apologise to the shopkeepers of Stony Stratford, which is where most of the thieving occurred. Sorry. Here's an old Yorkie advert, which I hope puts a a smile back on your faces.

get milk

I didn't have to teach her to drink the milk that's left at the bottom of the cereal bowl. She just started doing it on her own. Very proud.

dan's very best

International superstar graphic designer Ben Terrett sends me a message:

"I'm not sure if you do guest posts.

But if you did, and you asked me, I'd submit this picture."

how i earned one million pounds

Simple. I just put this image here...

...and then they will send me the money next week.

They are, after all, 'above the fold', so I'm expecting them to come good on their promise.